booyah The Final Pitch

SportsHollywood: In the spirit of the film Field of Dreams, will you stand out in the center of the field and "have a catch?"

MARCIA WEIGEL(Shop Lady, Field of Dreams Movie Site): Sure. I could do that.

JOYCE LANSING (Shop Lady, Left and Center Field of Dreams): Oh, sure I would!

That's right! We went around the owners and made a plea to the shop clerks! Were we really that desperate—would we really go that low?

You bet.

We looked out onto the field, which seemed to turn greener in the golden light of the late afternoon; the corn in the outfield gently rocked and rumbled in the breeze, as if applauding. We were healing the field's pain! The open wound from third base into center was finally closing. Visions of Kevin Costner and Dwier Brown playing catch in center field filled our minds -- and now Joyce and Marcia were going to "have a catch" along with them. Let the healing begin!

Sadly, once the camera was shut off, one of the ladies informed us that there was a pending lawsuit that prevented either woman from crossing the field into enemy territory. So we devised a relay, with Rodney Lee on the center field border to catch the throws from each clerk and toss the ball on to the rival shop, avoiding any "touching."

Unfortunately, by the time we were set up to film the historic catch across the borderline, the shop clerks had lost their nerve. (Better to lose your nerve than your job.)

It was over.

Baseball had not brought people together. The field's pain would never be eased.



"Baseball is the most perfect of games, solid, true, pure and precious as diamonds. If only life were so simple. Within the baselines anything can happen. Tides can reverse; oceans can open. That's why they say, 'the game is never over until the last man is out.'"
—W.P. Kinsella, "Shoeless Joe"

Ray Kinsella: "No wait, I have done everything that I've been asked to do! I didn't understand it, but I've done it; and I haven't once asked 'what's in it for me?'"
Shoeless Joe: "What are you saying Ray?"
Ray Kinsella: "I'm saying, what's in it for me?"
Shoeless Joe: "Is that why you did this... for you?"

© 1997 by Universal City Studios, Inc.
Sometimes a greater lesson can be learned from a loss than from a victory. What did we learn here?

Not much.

We learned that baseball can not always bring people together.

We learned that Phardoe can urinate into Wisconsin all the way from Iowa (when we park on the state border and he relieves himself on the freeway roadside).

We learned that paying for plane tickets, publicists, cameramen, models, hotel fees, ballfield tickets, specialized jerseys, caps, and meal money can run into a lot of money.

Mostly, we learned that while there are a lot of nice people in Iowa, film is not reality, and neighbors aren't necessarily neighborly.

The corn was now gone, baseball season was over, and a long winter was approaching.

On the flight back, the voice beckoned us to Dallas for some football to reunite Nick Nolte, Mac Davis and the cast of North Dallas Forty, but the magic was gone.

We took our ball and went home.

It was all just a bunch of corn, anyway.



Production MAIN PAGE: "If you build it, the other guy won't leave." How baseball didn't bring two people together.
Production CHAPTER ONE: Filming begins on a farm in Iowa, but soon the set crosses onto the neighbor's yard, and the "Field of Dreams" is owned by two different farmers.
Factions CHAPTER TWO: "If you build it, they will come." And they did! 750,000 of them! But which side of the field should they be on? Here's the back story on the two rival sides of the Field of Dreams.
Plots CHAPTER THREE: We devise strategies to help baseball bring the two rival tourist shops together. (Along with some really twisted schemes.)
Milhoan CHAPTER FOUR: SportsHollywood rallies the creators of the film join us in our quest to unite the rival souvenir shops and to "ease their pain."
Costner CHAPTER FIVE: We make our final pitch. Can SportsHollywood (and baseball) bring the two sides together again? What finally happened, and who went to jail.
Costner BUY THE MOVIE: Buy the DVD or video. (The DVD contains a documentary about the field.)




Written by Jeff Hause, with assistance from Melissa Jones.

Photographs courtesy of Steve Eastin; Low and Inside; Don Lansing; Al and Rita Ameskamp; Dave West; and Left and Center Field of Dreams.

Film and Video images from "Field of Dreams" © 1997 by Universal City Studios, Inc.


Produced by Rich Hull

Written and Directed by Rodney Lee Conover, Jeff Hause, Dave West and Rich Hull

Edited by David Dodson.

Promotion & publicity by Zachary Rosenfield of Eddie Michaels & Associates, Inc., Beverly Hills, CA.


Michael Milhoan; Steve Eastin; Art LaFleur; the Lansing family; the Ameskamp family; Keith Rahe; Joyce Lansing; Marcia Weigel; Melissa Jones; Kay Starr; Lee Fleming, Jr.; Dave Hines; Anthony Ross; Karen Bailey; the good students of Baylor University, Kinga the Polish maid ("Ah, Kinga..."), and baseball (which doesn't, in fact, bring people together, but is still fun to watch).


Hitler, Satan, Ty Cobb, or Abner Doubleday (none of them ever did show up out of the corn.)

Jeff, Dave ("Phardoe") and Rodney on the porch swing.


sports | hollywood | columns | about us | store | ComedyOnTap | newsletter | links
Copyright © 2004, All Rights Reserved.